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Brigada: Adventures in Marogondon, Cavite

I was a guest and co-host for this segment of Brigada to feature Maragondon as the next travel and adventure destination near Manila. Go watch and discover what the town can offer for tourism.

Sunday, August 03, 2014

My Top 10 funny incidents in a hotel and resort

I have lots of undocumented or non-bloggable funny things that I encountered while I’m staying in a hotel or resort. I kept the experience to myself and it also reminds me whenever I’m going to share a funny story to my friends and family. There are lots of funny incidents happened, but I listed only 10 and maybe in the future, I can post my part 2.

I’m sure some of my friends who are with me will remember those funny moments haha.
so here’s my top 10 funny incidents while I’m in a hotel or resort.

1. Along came a Spider
Me and my room mate woke up in the morning and prepared ourselves for a breakfast. I was about to open the TV to watch the news but I got surprised to see this big spider on the floor, a spider with size of my palm. Its funny that I went back to my bed and look at it again if its real, then check again if that spider is a venomous type, but sadly I don’t even know any spider type that is venomous haha. I told my room mate to check out that big spider. Then we took photos of the spider and I used that morning newspaper to let the spider crawl on it and threw it away outside the window.

2. Tuko
After traveling for 6 hours by land and sailing the ocean for 2 hours, we checked in to this resort in a remote island. We arrived there at around 6pm and all of us group of 15 people so tired. We ate our dinner and then the tour organizer told us that we can rest early so that we can wake up the next day to do lots of activities around the island resort. Inside the room there were 4 of us people who are busy with our laptops, blogging away our experiences and adventure around the island. I’m doing my laptop stuff on a desk and near the window, all of us are so quiet typing and writing for an hour and then suddenly a big sound filled the entire room. “Tukoooo!!!” Tukooo!!!” when I heard that, I automatically got surprised and jumped away from my seat and desk, and then everyone laughed and I realized it’s a Tuko Lizard standing outside near the window. I told them if I hear the lizard again, I won’t be surprised, but after some minutes, the lizard made the sound and I jumped again away from my seat. hahaha.

3. Ghost in the toilet
It’s the funniest and the most hated experience ever, I have third eye and there are times that it opened up accidentally. My experience was in a resort, I was so tired and sleepy because we don’t have internet inside the room. It was around 9pm, then my room mate decided to go out to use the internet at the club house, he said that he will check his email and be back right away. I was watching tv the whole night and realized that it was 2 hours ago when my room mate went out. I said to myself..he might be back soon, If ever he comes back I’ll give him the key of our room, because I want to sleep our room locked. But I changed my plan, I turned off the tv and decided to go the club house to hand over him the keys, but then after I went out of the bed, I heard a large “ahemmmmmm” coming from a big male voice. I got stunned and realized that someone might be inside our bathroom. As I approached the bathroom, I was about to place my ears on the bathroom door and I heard the big “ahemmm” sound again.. holy shit!! there’s a guy inside the bathroom. I opened the door and saw that nobody is in there… I closed the door, laughed a bit and then turned on the TV and watch a scary show afterwards. The ghost might be busy using the loo.

4. Religious tv show
This was in Boracay, me and my room mate were so tired after covering an event for the entire day, he went out of the room to have a meeting with his PR team to discuss an activity the next morning. I was left in the room lying on the bed and watching some movies in HBO. Then I switched the channel because I was so bored and have no plans in sleeping yet, I want to enjoy my stay more there in Boracay. I was so busy switching the channel and then I didn’t know that I fell asleep. Then I think I woke up after 30 minutes, and saw my room mate fixing his bed, and he told me that he was in the room 15 min. ago, I told him that he should turn the tv off when he arrived because I’m sleeping already, then he said that he thought that I was praying with my eyes closed and watching that religious tv show, I was shocked and saw that I was tuned to this local religious tv show, I told him I’m really sleeping and the night ended with lots of laughs and then some beers.

5. Massaged by a muscle man
We learned from our tour organizer that we have two complimentary massage service from the resort’s in house spa. Me and my room mate planned that we can book our spa service at around 9pm. So we went there according to the sched, from there a nice lady at the reception center welcomed us and told us that we have free “adonis” massages. I told the lady receptionist what’s the “adonis” thing, she said that it’s a hard level massage, me and my room agreed for that service and we are so excited for it. Two ladies accompanied us upstairs and I told my room mate that I hope the lady masseuse is bigger than me because I’m fat. He said that the spa center might assign a masseuse that matches to our body built. The two lady from the spa left us at the lobby and then two big guys around 5”9 feet with big muscles and dark tan skin appeared in the room and then they told us that they will accompany us to our separate room. I started to get the weird feeling that something is wrong, then I found out that the guy is also in the closed room with me. He lit up the candles and told me to lay down on the spa table. OMFG. I want to cry that night because a muscular man is touching my body. I was so disappointed after it and I saw my room mate so speechless and I think he was in shock too.

6. The Cheaters tv show
This is in Boracay again, my room mate who was with me in that muscular guy spa center is also my room mate here. We’re going back to Manila the next day, and I tempted my room mate that we should get a nice spa service inside the room, we can request from our tour organizer if its okay to have a free service, after some text and calls, we got the go signal already to place a spa schedule in our room. The moment has arrived and two ladies went inside our room. They massaged us in our own beds, We were watching tv that night when the two masseuse arrived, I was tuned in to this tv network that features an episode about Hollywood gossips. Then after some hours, The Cheaters tv show aired, me and my room mate were both asleep when the two lady masseuse is busy rubbing our body, then I woke up when I heard a big “gasp”, “huhh” and some chats, I noticed that our masseuse were shocked when they saw an episode of The Cheaters tv show, this tv show records and follow the other partner for having another relationship, all are caught on cam, the latest was the tv show installed a hidden CCTV camera and they caught the partner having sex with another person, the tv show went inside the home and the other partner confronts the guy for adultery. The two lady masseuse were shocked and just can’t believe what they saw, they are already watching TV and no longer massaging us. I was laughing really hard and tried to contain it, but I burst in laughing and told them that’s real. The funny thing is.. the two lady are sitting on our back while they are watching TV hahaha. My room mate is asleep and didn’t know what happened.

7. Two big guys and one bed
The hotel assigned two person to occupy one room. That left me and another room mate who got a big belly. I was wishing that the room they gave to us have two beds, but as I entered, I saw a nice kitchen, a nice bathroom, a nice sofa, a nice tv and one small bed!!! OMFG!!! one small bed. We slept in the same bed for two days, its hard to sleep laying down on our back, so we slept sideview, because we are big and obese, its hard to sleep in a normal position and so we decided to sleep back to back. After two days while I’m fixing my stuff and getting ready to go back to Manila. I sat down the sofa and noticed that it slide to recline position and then I found out that the bed can be converted into a sofa bed. Sofa bed is a late superhero.

8. The celebrity
We already checked out in our hotel in Hong Kong, me and my companion are ready to fly back to the Philippines, after stepping out of the elevator, we walked so proud that our 1st time to fly out of the country is a dream come true. We are at the lobby of the hotel and then my friend noticed that there’s a guy at our back who is talking to a hotel lobby staff that looks like that star in Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon movie, and then the guy walks so fast and went ahead of us, I just saw his back, he is tall, with long hair down to his cheeks. I said to my friend, Chow Yun-Fat ??? he said… yes!! its Chow Yun-Fat, I said that guy isn’t him, he’s too skinny. And then after stepping out of the hotel, we saw two Chinese or maybe Korean girls went out of the hotel chasing the guy. I asked the hotel lobby staff is that Chow Yun-Fat, then he answered with a bit of cluelessness. Then I saw the tall guy crossed the street and I recognized that he is really Chow Yun-Fat, I told my friend, you know this is rare to spot a big international celebrity, let’s chase him and have a photo with him. We are carrying this heavy trolly luggage, and it slow us down, we decided to leave those luggage infront of the hotel and cross the other side of the street to intercept him. So we met him after my friend shouted… Chow Yun-Fat!.. and then he faced us and its really him…. he’s a nice guy and allowed us to have a photo with him, he grabbed my iPhone and took us our photo and then he took my friend’s DSLR and he took photo of them. So cool.

9. I’m not a messenger or delivery guy
I got this complimentary three day stay in a hotel in Ortigas, The sponsor emailed me some notes and a letter addressed to the hotel’s general manager, the sponsor told me to print it and show it at the hotel front desk for me to avail the free three day stay. I went to the hotel one hour early before the official check in, I approached the front desk carrying my trolly luggage and wearing my simple clothes – a shirt, black pants and white rubber shoes. I lined up at the front desk and allow the other hotel customers to settle their check out, for my turn to settle my check in, the lady receptionist at the front desk asked me what' I’m inquiring, I told her that I’m looking for this hotel general manager and I have a letter for her from this company. Then the lady receptionist, told me that their GM is not around, she said that I can hand over to her the letter, so I gave her the letter, and then she just read “scan” it and then placed my letter on folder and continued her job. I just watched her do her job and I’m waiting there for my hotel room keys and then she went back to me and asked me again if there’s any business that concerns me, I told her about the letter and then she told me that she will give the letter to their GM when she arrives, then I told her that she didn’t understand and didn’t read the letter carefully, I told her its about my free accommodation for three days and I’m the guy assigned to check in to their room. She didn’t believe and I told her to read the letter again, she noticed that I’m holding already my valid ID for verification during check in, and then she finishes reading the letter and went away, and ordered the other receptionist to welcome me and assign one deluxe room for me. She vanishes right after..maybe she got embarrassed and thought that I might be an office delivery guy or messenger, I laughed so badly when I was inside the elevator. Hotel guest 1 vs. Receptionist 0

10. The bed folds while im on it
The hotel got two rooms, one master’s bed room and one guest room. My wife and child stayed in the master’s bedroom, and then I occupied that guest room. I like my guest room because there’s a nice office desk with lamp and a small bed that is best for my size. It was around 2am when I decided to sleep, I was so busy surfing the net, chatting with my friends in Facebook and downloading some movies (taking advantage of the fast internet connection of the hotel), I closed the door and turned off all lights, I went to the bed, sat on it first and lay my head on the pillow. I can’t sleep right away so I shifted my body to a different sleeping position, and then I wiggled for some comfort and then as I wiggled myself, the bed wiggled too and it slide down and hit my head to the floor and then the bed folds into half and saw my legs and feet in the air and my knees close to my face. Holy smoke! the bed is a transformer!! and its eating me alive! hahhaa. I didn’t noticed that it’s a folding bed. I hurt the back of my head and I laughed so hard because it reminded me those funny cartoons accidents, like the bed eats you while it folds. haahaha. I shared the story to my wife the next morning and she can’t stop laughing.

The blogger

Azrael Coladilla is the blogger and founder of Azrael's Merryland Blog. This blog started as a personal blog in 2003, and then converted the blog into a lifeblog about his interest and reporting about pop culture, lifestyle, entertainment, technology, food, travel, toys, outdoor adventure, internet and social media. Awarded as the 2009 Most Influential Blogger for Luzon, Philippines, awarded by the Philippine Blog Awards. He is the founder of several online communities - Manila Bloggers Network, PBNetwork PH, Oh My Food! community, Cavite Bloggers, Travel and Blog Community, and Philippine ToyCon. He loves to travel, explore, discover, eat new food, document and record his life, meet new people, do photography and collects Transformers toys.

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